Back to Part 1: How To Declutter and Organize Your Home
2: How To Let Go Of Individual Items – a.k.a. Common Reasons We Hold On To Stuff
“Stuff has gotten a lot cheaper, but our attitudes toward it haven’t changed correspondingly. We overvalue stuff.”
– Paul Graham
So while you’re decluttering, how can you decide what stays or goes? Here’s some advice on specific objections and reasons you may be holding onto clutter:
- I Might Need It. I’ll let you in on a secret – I’ve given away literally hundreds of items that I thought I might need someday. In over ten years of ruthlessly clearing out items, so far the only item I missed was a small toolbox, because I moved and needed a wrench to unscrew a light fixture. I’ve never missed any of the clothes that were taking up space in my closet, the random kitchen things I never used, or all those books I was holding onto to read “someday.”
- It Has Sentimental Value. This is the area I struggle with the most. I have a very difficult time getting rid of sentimental reminders. In the end, if I’m not displaying it, and I’m not using it – I give it away. Rather than keep lots of items, I try to display sentimental items for a year or (in cases of small items) even a few years. After that, I only hold onto a select few. People have suggested taking pictures and removing the item once it becomes clutter. This is difficult for me to do, but so far not only have I not missed the items – I rarely even look at the digital pictures of them.
- But They’re Pictures – My Memories! I only have a small number of physical photos – but if you have many, consider archiving them digitally, and keeping only select ones in albums or on display. They’re not doing anyone any good sitting upstairs in the attic or crammed in a corner, hidden away from people.
- I’m Going To Fix It. Before we even talk about whether it’s worth fixing something, consider this: ask yourself – if it was fixed, would I really need it? Very often the answer is no – something has been broken for months, and you haven’t missed it. You’ve just been weighed down by the commitment you’ve made to yourself to fix it. Let go of the commitment – and let go of your broken items. If you insist you will fix it, give yourself a deadline. Write an exact date and time on a post it note and stick it to the item. Stick to your deadline – and get rid of the items if they aren’t fixed by then.
- It Was a Present. Sometimes we get gifts that don’t have sentimental value – but we just feel guilty getting rid of. If you are holding onto something because someone gave it to you and you would feel guilty tossing it, realize that it’s not the physical items you are holding on to – but rather the feelings and friendship. Once you accept that, you can just get rid of it (donation or otherwise) – I’ve never had a friend ask me where their gift went. If you have a hard time doing that, you could try and find a friend or family member who would enjoy and use the item – but I recommend really accepting that you don’t need the physical gift and just letting it go. This lesson took me a long time to accept, but I have been much happier since.
- These Are Important Documents. This is a really difficult one for me as well. I personally have tried to move all my important paperwork online, but there are some items that I keep physical backups of. My approach has been to designate a storage area in my bookshelf and purchase a number of 3 ring binders for some of these must-haves. However, I do regularly clear out other paperwork – invitations, Christmas cards, business cards, magazines, etc. Non “official documents” should be treated like any other clutter, no matter how small it is.
- It’s not MY Clutter. Got a messy roommate, significant other, etc? That’s a tough situation – and is more in the realm of house politics than dealing with organizing items. The strategy that has always worked for me is I’ve had my own room in shared apartments – and the agreement has been, keep your mess in your room. Perhaps a similar agreement will work for you. Another way to compromise is pick a few activities that really bother you – for me, leaving dishes out and not taking out the trash are the worst offenders, so I insist on those while not picking fights with roommates over other less egregious offenses. I don’t mind the newspapers, magazines and books left out.
- I’m Holding on to it For Someone. The first step here is – stop doing that! Your home is not someone else’s storage. As for items already in your home, just contact people and ask them to take the items. Often you’ll find they’ll tell you they no longer want it, or have even forgotten they left it in the first place. If they insist they can’t take it, and you must store it for them – again, that’s an issue that is more interpersonal relations than it is clutter. I suggest perhaps giving them a reasonable deadline by which to pick it up, or it goes to charity.
Part 3: A Philosophical Discussion – Why Do You Have Clutter?
Letting Go Of What Has Held You Back
Have you been held back in your life – by what’s happened in your past? You don’t have to be defined by what happened before – you have your whole life ahead of you. Make the most of it. Click right now to read the details about my course The Action Solution and see if it’s something you’d be interested in.